Drawing Blanks

Can I just say that I hella freaken love my kids. They are the cutest ever. I know every mother says the same thing about their kids...and every mother is CORRECT!!! :)

I been wanting to come and blog....just write...anything....about what ever has been going on. But I just havent been on cuz I've been drawing blanks. Sunday we.....uuuhhh....we..... ummmm... weeeeeeeeeeeee...... Well, Monday we did some....uhhhh...Monday? Mooooonday? Hmmmm...Monday weeeeeee...... Well, last Saturday there was this one ummmm....it was uhhhhh........ Hmmmm....Sunday. Oh yeah, Sunday wellllll.... YEAH! Drawing blanks. LOL

We DID go to San Jose on Saturday for my brother's football game. Utah State University against San Jose State University. WE WON!! YAY. It was a fun game and it was good to go with my sister Karma, that lives out there and my mom, who works out there. The kids had a blast and the weather was sooo nice. We tried to catch a 6am flite back so we got to the airport at 5am....HELLA got bumped off the first 3 flites and finally got a flite out at 1pm and got back into SLC at 4pm. That was a VERY long day. Good thing I had left baby Line here in SLC with her daddy. It was just me and the 2 kids. Isi did pretty well. I was mostly worried about him if we were to get stuck at an airport..which we did. Oooh the GLAM life of standby!!!

Isi was cooperative during the flite tho. I was happy. He had fun during snack time. He dipped his Biscoff cookie in sprite...I dunno. I guess he gets that from his dad. To pass the time between take off and landing, I had him watch a movie on the laptop.

So, I learned that I can travel with 2 kids and not kill any of em. I will have another test this Friday. I am taking all my kids to Arizona for a birthday party...ALLL THREEEE!!! So we'll see how that goes. This is when Benadryl comes into play, I guess.

Be careful what you wish for...

This baby birth has the been the most different. My first birth was a sad one. No cry after I gave birth, no diaper changes, no baby to take home. All in all a very very sad experience. My second birth was a scary one. We went in for a routine check up and they discovered that he was in fetal distress and so he was an emergency C-section. As soon as they pulled him out, he was rushed to NICU. I didn't get to hear him cry. I didnt get to hold him and didnt even get to see him until I left the OR. He was in NICU for 4 weeks and the whole time I had to pump for him and they fed him thru a tube, then thru a bottle. By the time he came home he was used to the bottle and so breast feeding was a challenge. I breastfed him for about 2 weeks after he came outta NICE and then we were stricktly bottle.

When I had this new baby, she was a healthy baby. We heard her 1st cry, we were able to see her right away and also hold her as soon as she was cleaned off. It was so special to go thru that. So I vowed that I would breast feed her for at least 12 months, since everything was on track. After about 3 weeks of getting up to feed her every 3 to 4 hours, I WAS DONE!!! I couldn't imagine doing that for a whole year. I told Teki, "I wish that you could do this. This is the most annoying thing ever. I am tired, I'm soaked every freaken morning and I'm tired of this. I don't wanna do this anymore". I put her on a bottle. We switched every other feeding between the boop and the bottle. Then it was 2 bottle feedings then the boob. Then it went to bottle feedings all day and just give her the boob at nite when we were in bed. Before I knew it, my milk supply is almost non exsistant. NOW, nooooow I wanna breast feed all day but there is nothing there. She sucks and sucks and sucks and only gets a little bit of milk. I feel bad cuz I know she is starving but because I am not REALLY ready to let go of that part of our bonding, I make her stay on the boob and suck. So basically she is sucking for free...what else is that called....oh yeah-child molestation!! LOL.

So, I decided that I will take her off the boob :( I wish that I kept her on the boob and stuck it out. I guess that's what I get for being selfish. I am so sad that I am closing this part of mtoherhood and our bonding. But I guess I just need to be careful what I wish for, cuz it'll come back and bite me in the ass!!!

Liz's BIG adventure!!

Today we decided to let Liz fly by herself to San Jose. We were all supposed to go today. My brother who coaches football up at Utah State University, up in Logan, is playing San Jose State tomorrow, so we all decided to go up there and watch the game. This is only possible cuz Teki works for Delta, so we fly for free and my mom and sister live out in San Jose, so we have a ride and a place to stay. If not for those things, we woulda been rooting from home cuz we are BUTT BROKE!! Anyways, we were all supposed to go today but a dear friend of mine had a baby shower today that I really really wanted to go to, so we decided it was time we sent Liz on her own and see how she does.

Liz was SOOO excited, needless to say, but me and Teki were over here sweating balls. Although, she is probably the most book smarts girl we know, her street smarts or street credibility is NO BUENO!! She will freak around and get her butt kidnapped. But we need to learn to let go and let her learn and live and experience life. So far, we have sheltered her so bad but she is getting older now and we realize that she neeeds to, as Mariah Carey says "Spread her wings and beging to fly" (Butterfly song). So Teki takes her to the airport and fills out the paperwork needed because she is an "unaccompanied minor" and she is off :) Teki gave her his cell phone so that she can call us as soon as she touches ground and as soon as my mom picks her up. While at Walmart, I get a text from Teki's phone; "I'm in California". I just had to laugh so hard. She is such a texter, ALREADY!! I tried calling but she didnt answer, just another text; "I am waiting for grandma". LOL.

So, I guess that I can breath a little easy knowing that has a little streed cred!!! LOL....she aight. She aint gangsta like me, but she is getting there. Before we know it, we will be sending her all over America to "pick something up from so&so". If yer poly, you know what I'm talking about!! hahaha...Me and the other 2 kids will join her tomorrow, right before the game starts. We will cheer out little hearts out for the Utah State AGGIES!!! WOOT WOOT!!!

My little girl is growing TOO FAST!!

ps. its been a while since I've blogged and I've found a few blogs that I wanna follow...can someone please tell me how to follow these blogs...thanks!! :)

Counting my blessings...

We were married for 7 years before we even got pregnant. In the meantime, we had the blessing of adopting my sister's baby, that she had out of wedlock and at a young age. We are blessed to have Liz in our lives. But to have a child of our own was a prayer that we held in our hearts but a wish that we had come to terms with, would never happen. Finally the Lord blessed us with our son and due to circumstances beyond our reach or understanding, the Lord saw it fit, to take him back to heaven. Devasted and not really knowing if that same opportunity of having a baby of our own would come along, we kept the faith and continued on. Two years after our baby passed, we were blessed with antoher baby boy. Elated beyond words, we embraced this little blessing and cherished our new baby boy.

My body works in a different way. When I am bigger, I don't menstrate or ovulate, and since I have been big almost my whole life, my reproduction system is totally off. I dont know when I will menstrate, therefore I have no idea when I ovulate or ever if I WILL ovulate. So when in Janurary when I found out I was pregnant, I was surprised and excited. This pregnancy was SOOOOOO different from my pregnancies I had with my boys. My boys was such a breeze but this pregnancy I had morning sickness from the beginning to the end. That's how I knew it was a girl. In April, it was confirmed that we were having a girl and Teki insisted from the beginning that we name her after his mom, Ailine Kinikini Lao.

This baby has been such a joy to be around. I won't lie and say it's been kicks and giggles this whole time. She is 7 weeks old and is a tiny baby but she let's her pressence be known. She has a soft little cry but she cries a lot. She doesn't eat much, but she eats alot. She isn't awake for long, but she is awake a lot and so you can probably imagine my frustrations at times. But when I look at her little face when she IS crying, or eating or just awake, I thank God for sending her to me. I'm thankful for her little voice, and her appitite and her little mood swings.

Tonight, I got in a little fight with Teki. I just wanted 1 night, just ONE night that I can sleep all the way thru the night and not have to wake up to her cry or make her bottle or change her diaper. He told me that he works and goes to school and on top of that he has to be up in the morning to get Liz ready for school and go on a field trip with them in the morning, so he had to sleep. For a split second, I wished this wasnt my life. How selfish can I get??!! This is why I really started to blog again. I needed to talk crap about myself and vent about me. What if she just wasn't here? Would I rather have that life? HELL NO!! I cannot imagine life without her here. So what if I only sleep in 3 hour intravals. So what if I only have time to shower every other day. So what if the house is a mess. I wouldn't want it any other way. I would much rather not sleep, smell like a sweaty horse and live in a hoarder looking house, then not have her here with me. Sometimes, well...if you really REALLY know me, you know that "sometimes" word should be changed to "MOST OF THE TIME".....I take things for granted. I am not humble and I am selfish. I am glad that I have an annoying hubby and cry baby kids here to keep me in check.

I am so thankful for all my little blessings here with me. I wish, everyday I wish, that my oldest son was here with me, but I know that he is in a better place. Ailine is such a cute little baby and I look forward to all the mile stones that we will be going thru with her, as well as Isi as he is in the middle of his terrible 2's. And I also look forward to any other blessings that the Lord see's fit to send to me and Teki.

I'm back...I think.....

Soooooo, yeah. The last time I blogged was about a year ago....I think it says Nov. 26, 2009, to be exact. It's like, you know when you have a class, and you skip class for a few days and you go back and you are so far behind that you dont even wanna deal with it. You feel overwhelmed with all the work that needs to be done in order for you to catch up. Finally you just stop going to class.....out of sight, out of mind. Yeah...that's kinda how I felt thinking about coming back to blog. I missed a few days, then it turned in to a few weeks, then a few months and before I knew it, a whole year had passed by and I havent blogged. I just feel like SOOOOO much has happened that I just dont know where to start. So I guess I'll just give a little synopsis.

So, since my last post in November 2009 here is what happened:
Dec: Decided to tell Liz she was adopted...this is a gooood story and when i'm not lazy I'll tell the story...it was so sad... also started a diet...
Jan: Isi turns 2, went to Maui for a week w/4 of my BFF's, found out I was pregnant...
Feb: officially ended my diet and found I had lost about 18 lbs :) filed our adoption papers with the court.
Mar: Turned the big THREE-OH!! I feel soooo old. Finalized our adoption to Liz (another cool experience)
Apr: My angel turned 4, sealed Liz to us in the SLC temple (another cool story :))
May: Liz turns 9, we find out we are having a girl :)
June: Teki turns 30
July: Pregnant, HUGE and hot as hell....
Aug: refer to "July"
Sept: had my baby girl 9/24
Oct: My baby brother Asa gets married
Nov: I get back to blogging...

I think that about sums it all up.

Other then that, there has been HELLA crap that has gone on inbetween the workouts and the baby but I think I wanna start another post. Just wanted to catch everyone up to speed with my life. So, wish me luck that I keep "coming to class" so that I don't get overwhelmed with all the super fun and exciting things that happen in my life *sarcastic voice* YAY!